It has been eight days of eating in freedom. It is so much more than the eating though. I can't wait to start unwrapping the layers of hurt and pain that have caused me to cling to this ugliness for so long. I am ready to be free completely. It has been hard at times to mechanically run through theses behaviors each day. It really feels unnatural to not weigh, run, drink soft drink, run to fast food, etc. However, each day I feel like Jesus hands me another small nugget of freedom. I am so excited for the day when I am not thinking about what to eat, what I weight, etc. I can't look into the future though. I need to be faithful for today. Jesus died to set me free and to set the world free. There are so many ways that we can be held in bondage. What is crazy is that Satan can even use the gifts that God has given us (food, running) to put us in bondage. I don't want him to have the victory in my life. Christ deserves me WHOLE heart. Mark 12:30 takes on new meaning for me now, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind, and with all your strength." I want to be free to love Him with my WHOLE HEART because He is the only one that can satisfy my life and give me peace. Thank you Jesus, for being patient with me all these years. Thank you that you chose to act at this time in my life. May it be for your glory. I have added snacks at the recommendation of the wise person who started me on this journey. It helps me to not be so ravenous at each meal. I feel like it is going to give me even greater control this first few weeks where it does feel mechanical. One day it will be natural :+)
Fran
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